The Dating Dilemma Of Buying A Birthday Card

… I’m Talking Stop, Drop, and Roll!…

Yes, that’s the card I picked out for Date #5, otherwise known as Bohdi’s, birthday. And that’s not the best part! The best part is when you open it, it plays the song “Burn Baby Burn, Disco Inferno…” I laughed so hard that every person in the card isle stopped to look at me.

But seriously, I had no choice! Buying a birthday card for a guy I’ve been dating for 3 weeks is a far bigger challenge than I ever anticipated!

First of all, I’ve only bought birthday cards for boyfriends, and none of them had birthdays until we were months into the relationship, so by that time I could buy the mushy one and the funny one. But we are talking 3 weeks people, and I am spending his birthday with him. It’s too soon for a gift, so I must bring a card.

I started out in the “Just for fun section” but they were too general, so I looked under the “for him” section. Well! Those cards were big boobed bikini girls on the cover asking “One, Two, Three, Four, do you want to see more?” or “For your birthday thought you would like a perfect 10″… ummm he’s got a perfect 10! Or if I’m not a 10 I’m a 9.9… or maybe an 8.2… see these cards are messing with my self image!  Next…

Then there were the Family Guy cards, and even though he loves Family Guy, I mean: Inside:  WHATEVER YOU DECIDE TO DO, HOPE IT’S FREAKIN’ SWEET! Who Wants to Play Drink the Beer?

Just not appropriate coming from me. There were cards with a big bulldog chomping a cigar in his mouth and an actual feather protruding from his hat, an ugly purple gorilla doing something I’m not sure I understood, and a pair of mushrooms with googly eyes that read “to a fun guy”… I think that has something to do with hallucinogenic drugs.

So, I wandered over to the serious cards and found one that looked very nice, not too flowery, not too religious, just kinda outdoorsy … “You’re a good man” it read on the front, and then I open it up.. “and a good dad.” ARRRGGGG! Next..

Another one, that looked pretty rustic.. “Nobody can fill the unique place in the world like you do. Nobody can smile your smile, laugh your laugh, be wonderful in the way that is so indisputably you.”  Okay, now we are getting somewhere. He does have a great smile and a great laugh. It’s general enough that coming from me would say ‘I think you’re special, but I’m not rushing things’… and then I opened it and it did in fact say, “You are special… and I Love You.”

Oh Hey-ll no! And from that point on I discovered that every “for him” birthday card in the serious section said I Love You.

I was running out of sections!  Until I found the musical cards. And that’s how I wound up with my card of choice. Okay, it is a bit suggestive, BUT, I think the fact that The Trammps are busting out Disco Inferno, will add enough humor to put out the fire that the copy may imply.

What do you think? Do I stick with the crazy singing, yet pretty suggestive card? Or do I need to go back to another card store and tone it down?

Help! I never anticipated the dating dilemmas that are presenting themselves. Comments welcomed below!